Archive for July 20, 2011

We’ve all experienced it at some point; the panic and hopelessness we feel when faced with a moment of indecision. True, it turns out less horrific than imagined most of the time – but I still get overwhelmed by it all. Something as trivial as what I would eat used to bother me until somebody else would make the choice for me, now I’m only bested by my conscience when I doubt my initial choice.

I was lost, I knew it was going to happen when I got off at the wrong bus-stop. I wasn’t paying attention to where  I was or where I was going – I was stuck in the middle of nowhere. I didn’t have long until my appointment and I begun to panic – in hindsight I needn’t have worried; it was only an appointment – so I’d be late, they’d cancel it, I’d have to make another – so what? It’d just be a wasted journey.

Walking down a long road with no real indication as to where I was going was bound to leave me confused, everywhere looked the same. I had a map – but on a straight road with no side-roads for reference things weren’t getting any better. I had crossed the road twice and walked back on myself a few times only to find that every bus-stop claimed the same “You are here” point as their own. I began to lose faith in maps altogether and went back to the basics – “guesswork” – after ten minutes of retracing my steps I opted for the other route.

I hoped I was in roughly the right place and hadn’t failed altogether by getting on the wrong bus. I sat and waited – hoping for my internal compass to kick in. I would otherwise have to ask somebody for at the very least, the right direction – as if on cue I saw somebody approaching – I swallowed my pride and figured I’d never see the person again, what did they care if they found out I was lost?

I doubted even this decision and expected him to laugh in my face. I found out after following his terrible directions that he didn’t actually know where he was going and probably just wanted me to go away. Fantastic!

I tried again and ended up asking somebody who – judging by the uniform he was wearing, worked in the local area. He had at least heard of the place and proceeded to give accurate and lengthy directions towards my destination. Success at last! It was as he described, a long and tiring walk. After such an eventful journey, I found it mildly amusing that my “important” appointment lasted less than 5 minutes –  I hoped I wouldn’t have to come back here any time soon and I dreaded the journey back – I knew I should’ve left a trail of breadcrumbs!